When you take them seriously, a relationship is a big decision.
You’ll have less time to yourself, and won’t be able to do a lot of the same things you get to do while single.
Sometimes, when you aren’t prepared for it, you can end up in a bad relationship that’s almost impossible to get out of. The key is knowing the right questions to ask about the relationship.
It’s difficult to be logical when you’re getting close to someone, but you’ll save yourself a lot of time and frustration if you deal with those serious relationship questions.
Whether you read relationship books, or go to couples therapy, avoiding the bigger issues in your relationship will eventually yield some pretty nasty results. You’ll end up wasting valuable time you could have spent enjoying being single.
The good news is that bad relationships, or incompatibility isn’t all that hard to recognize. You just have to be logical and a little analytical even in the beginning when everything is going well with a chick.
Questions To Ask In A Relationship
If you’re in a relationship, the biggest question to ask yourself has to do with your own happiness. Too many people end up in relationships because of other people’s expectations.
Society, family, and your own perception of yourself can all influence your relationship choices.
Another thing worth asking yourself is whether or not you’re the relationship type. It may be strange to consider, but monogamy isn’t for everyone. Some people just don’t handle relationships well.
If you’re the type who enjoys flying solo, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. The idea that having a girlfriend or settling down is a measure of your success isn’t exactly logical.
Some people do perfectly fine in relationships, and some don’t. If you don’t know which side of the equation you sit on, just ask yourself these questions:
- Do I enjoy time to myself?
- Do I get bored easily?
- Am I planning on living in the same place for a long time?
- Do my career goals mesh with the idea of a relationship?
All of these things matter. If you see yourself traveling the world and starting a business from your laptop while you go on adventures, you might not be the relationship type.
That being said, if you like small town life, and enjoy spending time with one girl at a time, then you might be better off settling down. There is no natural way to live; what matters is what works for you.
Serious Relationship Questions
Sometimes we stay in relationships out of a misplaced sense of guilt, or a feeling that we care about a girl and don’t want to hurt her feelings.
This is a tricky scenario, because it makes cutting the cord way harder.
It’s possible to care about someone in a non-romantic way, and not want to hurt their feelings as a result.
Unfortunately, this becomes a drain on you and your time. An uncomfortable conversation, is nothing compared to a relationship you don’t really want to be in.
Sometimes just talking things out with the girl you’re dating can solve a lot of the issues you might be having. You may even end up staying together, once you get things out in the open.
However, you have to be able to ask difficult questions, and have emotional conversations in order to either find a girl you want to be with, or disengage from the one you’re with.
No one likes hurting people’s feelings, but ultimately, your own time and emotional effort are more important.
In the long run, she’ll probably thank you for your honesty. Incompatibility goes both ways, and if you really aren’t right for each other, she’ll probably understand.
Relationship Questions To Ask Your Girlfriend
Sometimes just asking your girlfriend the right questions can make or break a relationship. Avoiding certain topics, or withholding certain kinds of feelings can poison even the best relationship.
Related: How To Build Trust In A Relationship
Ask your girlfriend what’s on her mind, and without being too submissive, do what you can to make her happy. Remember, a relationship is about compromise no matter how you look at it.
At some point, you’ll have to adjust your schedule, your attitude or your way of interacting with your girlfriend if you want things to work out. She’ll have to do the same. Essentially, balance is key.
The problem with relationships is that the longer they go on, the harder it is to fix what might be wrong with them. Ask these questions early on and you’ll save yourself a lot of headaches:
- Are we compatible?
- Are our lifestyles conducive to one another?
- Is the relationship only based on sex?
- Do I look forward to seeing her?
Be honest with yourself about these things. It’s not uncommon to get attached for the wrong reasons.
The sex might be good, or the girl could be very accommodating, but these aren’t strong enough factors to keep a relationship together.
Relationship Questions And Answers
Real change in relationships comes from the answers you get. You might be asking the right questions, but if you don’t accept or understand the answers, nothing will change.
This is a situation in which you have to put your emotions aside and be logical.
When you use the right judgment, you can see things more clearly. Our brains force us to bond, even though it may not be the best idea for us in our current life situations.
A good relationship comes to together when people use a mix of emotion and logic. Too much of one or the other and the time you spend together will be uneven.
No one wants a relationship that’s too analytical, and one that’s too emotional will just be too difficult to navigate.
Ask your girlfriend, or even a girl you’re seeing casually, good relationship questions, and you’ll have a much more fulfilling interaction.
Whether you stay together for a long time or not, communication is key.
Knowing what questions to ask in a relationship will make the process of meeting and getting close to a girl a lot more rewarding.
And remember, there is no shame in admitting to one another that there isn’t a strong level of compatibility.
Questions For Couples
Looking at other couples can be a good way to figure out what’s going on in your relationship. Every couple has problems, but some find ways to stick together and work through them.
If you know a couple that seems to have figured it out, and you’re struggling, see what their strategies are. It’s not impossible to make a relationship work, but sometimes you just have to learn by example.
People who have been married for a long time, usually know the most about how to make relationships work. If your parents are still together, see how they interact with one another. Take mental notes.
If two people can stay together for ten, twenty or thirty years, it means they’ve figured out how to work with each other.
Things might not be as exciting as they were in the beginning, but relationships are also partnerships.
It might sound a little cold, but it’s a lot like a business deal.
There are definitely ways to keep the novelty going, and to make things as exciting as they were when the relationship first started, but it won’t always be great.
You’ll notice this the more you pay attention to other couples. The key is to ask the right questions, and accept the answer, even if they surprise you.
Relationships are hard, but they aren’t impossible.