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Here’s What To Do When She Comes To Your Place For The First Time

Here’s What To Do When She Comes To Your Place For The First Time

BY Christopher Gramuglia

Here’s What To Do When She Comes To Your Place For The First Time

Most girls won’t come over to your place after a first date.

Even if things are going well, she still doesn’t know you and the implications of coming over may be too much for her at the moment.

Inviting a girl into your living space is essentially asking her if she wants to hook up, or if she wants to let things progress in some form or another.

It can go really well if you’re prepared, and it can go horribly wrong if you’re not.

You can’t just bring a girl into your apartment without thinking about what kind of effect it’s going to have on her.

Maybe there are things about your place that work fine for you, but that doesn’t mean that a girl you don’t know that well is going to think the same way.

There’s no reason to take your apartment or your house through a massive renovation before you invite her over, but you should take a few minutes to look around.

Ask yourself what kind of message your collection of Star Wars action figures or your fridge full of cheese sends to a girl you just met.

It’s totally cool to be into Star Wars and be a cheese connoisseur, but these are quirks about a person that could make or break the first hang out in the home.

No one is saying you have to hide who you are, but your place and the way it’s set up may create judgments in a girl’s mind about you, that isn’t necessarily fair or accurate.

Either way, if you want the night to be a success, you should plan accordingly and make sure that your home is ready for a visitor.

It should seem obvious but clean up before she comes over. No girl wants to have to step over a pile of dirty clothes, or a stack of empty pizza boxes to get into your bedroom.

If you have a kitchen, make sure it is absolutely spotless and stocked with something you can offer her.

Technically you’re playing host, and a glass of tap water with a stale Pop Tart isn’t going to cut it if she gets hungry.

Again, there isn’t a need to prepare a five-course meal, but just make sure there’s something in the fridge.

Cleanliness and organization goes for your bedroom too.

Look, there’s a good chance if she’s agreed to come over, you’ll end up in bed together, and the last thing you want is to bring her into a lair of disarray.

Pick your clothes up off the floor, make the bed and for the love of God, make sure it smells good in there.

Imagine bringing a girl into your bedroom that has the pungent aroma of sweaty dude embedded into the carpet and walls?

Don’t expect her to be polite and ignore it, and do what you have to do to make sure your bedroom is a suitable location for sex or otherwise.

It may not happen, but it’s always better to be prepared.

Having something planned is also a great idea. Just because you’re staying in doesn’t mean you can just look at each other all night.

She’ll still get bored and might even think you asked her over just to get laid, which will make her feel cheap. At the very least, you should pick a good movie to watch.

If you want to get creative, cook something with her and eat dinner together. It really doesn’t matter what the activity is, as long it counters any feelings she might have about being a booty call.

Just because she’s agreed to come to your place, doesn’t mean it isn’t technically a date.

You should look the part, and while you don’t have to dress up for a night on the town, don’t answer the door in gym shorts and your favorite t-shirt from high school.

If you do end up hooking up, ask her directly to stay the night. You may think that it’s not necessary to ask, or that it’s implied, but girls can be bashful or shy about just assuming they can stay over.

It’ll probably be late, so ask if her if she wants to crash. It’s not that big of a deal; just because you shared a bed doesn’t mean that the next step is walking down the aisle.

It’s a polite, gentlemanly thing to do. It’s not cool or high-value to stick her in an Uber and send her home to her own place.

Let her stay the night, and then, if you actually like her, go to breakfast the next day. When you really like a girl, these kinds of late Saturdays can be really fun.

No one is saying things have to get serious just yet, but if she seems like the right type, you’ll want to leave the opportunity open.

Lastly, if you have roommates, try and schedule things during a time when they won’t be around.

You can’t ask your roommates to leave for a few hours just because you want them gone, but you can invite her over when you know they’ll be out of town or out doing their own thing.

It’s not that having a roommate is a bad thing; it’s that having a third person hanging around makes things less personal, and may make her less prone to letting her guard down.

It doesn’t matter that it’s someone she doesn’t know.

She might still feel slutty about coming over and doesn’t want anyone—not even your roommate—to judge her for it. If you can get the place to yourself, then definitely do it.

It may not seem like it, but the first night you spend together at your place is critical.

She’ll be paying attention to a lot of the details, and her internal system for gauging what kind of guy you are will be running on high-speed.

It’s not rocket-science, but when she does leave the next day, your goal should be to make her feel glad she showed up in the first place.

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Christopher Gramuglia

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Chris is a personal trainer and graduate student of creative writing. He recently completed writing a fantasy novel that he hopes to turn into a trilogy, but also writes about topics like dating, fitness and what it means to be a man in the twenty-first century.

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