When it comes down to it, there are two types of men in this world: those that are mentally strong, having the ability to take control of themselves, their lives, using their energy to create something of true value. And those that are mentally weak, failing to muster the courage and strength necessary to propel their lives in the right direction.
It’s the mentally strong that make a difference in this world. One single mentally strong individual — man or woman — has the ability to change the world. The mentally weak, on the other hand, aren’t capable of changing the world alone.
Yet, together they do have a tremendous impact. Sadly, not a positive one. It’s the mentally weak that slow down progress.
Mental strength isn’t something that you’re born with; it’s something that you develop continuously over time. It’s continuous self-development that allows the mentally strong to remain mentally strong.
There is, however, a problem. Being mentally strong often means having a difficult time creating and maintaining healthy, loving relationships.
It’s a shame, really. Mentally strong men are the kind of men that all women are after. Every woman wants a man that is intelligent, wise, passionate, and motivated. Women want a man that has the ability to create a future for himself. I
t’s in our biology to be attracted to those that we deem powerful and most likely to succeed. So how does a mentally strong individual manage to make relationships work?
Well, the only way to know the solution is to first understand the problems:
You’re too ego-driven.
Mental strength is developed through a combination of introspection and understanding of the way the world around us works.
It’s when we explore our place in the world, how we want to spend our life, and what meaning we want our life to have, that we strengthen our concept of self.
Mental strength is little more than the concept or vision that we have of ourselves and our ability to bring those thoughts into the physical world.
In order to be mentally strong, you need to focus on you. You need to think about you, work on you, and better yourself. All this focus on self reinforces our egos.
When it comes to relationships, however, there is much less room for your ego. In order to love, you need to give your partner as much value as you give yourself.
You need to become more selfless — otherwise, love is an impossibility. The only way to do this is to find sufficient reason to do it.
Take some time and think about why you want a partner in life. Think about how life would be if you had to spend it alone. Find a reason to control your ego, and you will control it.
You don’t have room.
I’m not talking about having room in your apartment or in your heart. I’m talking about having room in your life. Do you have the time to put in the effort necessary to make a relationship work?
Do you have enough mental energy to dedicate to your partner in order to make love work? Do you have room in your life to share it with someone special?
It’s easy to say yes, and then go about your day. The problem with mentally strong individuals is that we often take on more than we ought to.
We have an appetite for success — and for whatever reason, we feel like we can have it all — a packed schedule and a woman to love.
Truth is, if you’re packing your life so much that you don’t have time for love, then you’re living wrong. You need to set your priorities straight.
In the end, all that we accomplish is nothing if we weren’t able to share it with someone we love. If you don’t have room, you need to make room.
You may have difficulty allowing yourself to feel.
The one thing that all mentally strong individuals have in common, is that they had to overcome something that they considered to be incredibly difficult to overcome.
It will differ from individual to individual, but if you’re struggling to find a partner, it’s likely that some past relationship played its part.
You may not be heartbroken anymore, but it’s likely that you trained your mind to shy away from love, from commitment, from allowing someone to get to know the you that only you know.
I get it. I’ve been there myself, and I can tell you that it is manageable. I understand the appeal of keeping your mind focused on your work, stopping it from wandering off and thinking about things that you believe distract you.
But it isn’t a distraction if it’s something you want permanently incorporated into your life. It takes time to turn off those blockers you’ve put in place, but meeting the right person helps.
Meeting her won’t solve your problems, but it will make it easier for you to open up again. Just be sure that when you do meet her, you take a chance. A real chance. I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to allow yourself to be vulnerable again.
You’re going to have to risk getting hurt, because that’s the only way to love is to love vulnerably.