My life has been one of extremes. I’ve built successful companies, dated women you’ve seen on the cover of fashion magazines, and partied with stars. But I’ve also been over six figures in debt, lonely and depressed more than once in my adult life, and wondering what the heck I did to get into some pretty sticky situations. William Blake says that “the road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom,” and in both my business and with what I teach, I hope to impart wisdom onto those whose lives have been, for better or worse, a little less excessive than my own.
My story isn’t dramatically different than the one you’ve heard a thousand times before – shy, socially anxious teenager falls in love and gets heart broken, spends a few years in dating purgatory, discovers it’s possible to get better at “this stuff,” and eventually discovers himself.
Details aside, what have I discovered?
I’ve discovered that the quality of women in a man’s life is a reflection of the quality of man that he is. A lot of men think that getting “game” will get them the woman of their dreams. And while a few women will fall for game, women ultimately fall in love with a man.
I’ve discovered that each man is the sole author of the story of his life. Whether he is a champ or a chump… a winner or a loser… a conqueror or a victim… it’s all in his perspective and resolve.
I’ve discovered that a man finds his best in the worst of moments. The strength of his character comes out when there’s a battle to be fought or a woman to be approached or a risk to take, and he owns the fact that he is the guy to do it.
I’ve discovered that the core of a man’s confidence comes from knowing his values – and his value. Whether it’s through personal trial, tribulation and eventual success, or validation from a respected peer group, a man cannot doubt who he is and what he stands for.
I’ve discovered that a man’s charisma comes from knowing and loving people – the art of flirting, the gift of empathy, the dance of sexiness. All necessary for the man who desires to know people in general, and who takes pleasure in getting to know men and women specifically.
And I’ve discovered that inspirational words aren’t enough – not if you want to teach “this stuff”. Being an effective teacher means being able to show what was done, why it was done, and why it works – consistently. It means being able to explain the words… the thoughts… the beliefs… and the values.
Over the years, these discoveries have worked their way into The Social Man. If there’s an idea of who I am, it’s on every page of this site, on every program we produce, and in every speech I give. I believe that it’s my responsibility to create the world I want to live in, and I intend for it to be a good one for you and for me.